The Search for the One
Love must be in the air… or maybe we’re just getting old. Who knows?
Recently, I’ve heard several of my close friends tell me that they have found The “One.” Let’s make it clear, these people aren’t the average “sucker for love” types. My friends are logical, intelligent, experienced daters. Many of whom I assumed would never settle down without a shotgun being involved. One friend in particular went from Sex and the City to Housewives of…. (maybe that show was a bad example but you get the picture) in less than a year. Continue Reading
Single in the City on a Saturday Night
The Setting: Two guys out on a Saturday night in Atlanta trying to find a bar/lounge.
The Situation: Roundup Russy and I go to a bar/lounge that caters to African Americans. There isn’t any parking available on the street, so we have to pay a suspicious looking man to park in the small poorly lit parking lot across the street. We get to the door of the establishment and there is a large security guard doing pat downs, checking ID’s and enforcing the dress code. Just past him a young lady sits at a desk collecting the cover charge. Continue Reading
To Marry or not to Marry
Ok, I’m going to keep it completely 100. I had a hidden agenda and a preconceived notion when I sent out the survey. I assumed most people got married either from fear of being old and alone, pressure from their mate, or because they are “supposed to” after a certain point. I attributed these reasons to the increasing high divorce rate. I was dead wrong! Many of the answers were well thought out and full of compassion. Below I will list the questions I asked and some of the more memorable answers. Continue Reading
D.O.D. The Death of Dating
Personally, I never liked the whole dating thing. It’s like paying to be interviewed when you don’t even know if you want the available position. Traditional etiquette makes it impossible for anyone to act like him/herself. You make eye contact but not for too long; try to be funny without being silly; And eat finger foods with a knife and fork. Most of the time, the guy is going through the motions in hopes that his efforts turns in to sex and the girl is counting down the dates until the two can have sex and she won’t seem…. you know. Or conversely, one person is looking for a life-long mate and the other is just trying to fill up a Saturday night. Continue Reading
Your Chick Chose me [A New Look at an Old Topic]
The Setup: Last weekend while standing in line for a Black History Exhibit, I observed a group of seemingly overbearing andh
catty mothers with their doleful looking children. All the children were extremely well groomed. The younger children were tightly held and immediately scolded when they spoke or moved. The older children moved listlessly as herded cattle.
The Question: Where are the fathers? Continue Reading
Why did you get married?
I have observed that after women break the age 25 mark their desire to marry grows exponentially each year. I have observed women analyzing the “marriageability” of a man after the first date or ending an existing relationship because the guy wasn’t moving towards marriage fast enough. I asked,why do you want to get married? The answers were elaborate but can be simplified down to status and security. As these women get older the word “single” becomes increasingly disturbing which causes their own insecurities to rise and desperation to set in. The other reason is that they crave the security of the nuclear family structure (father, mother and children). They want to raise future or current children in a safe and structured environment. Continue Reading
Daddy Issues
We either have them or are dealing with someone with them. What is the effect of the single parent home on relationships and friendships? Do people who grew up absent a father develop differently? I want to hear your thoughts. Continue Reading
Is monogamy just another form of selfishness?
As I was talking to my friend, I came to the conclusion that maybe the need to be monogamous stems from the need to have some one all to ourselves. In most situations a friendly relationship turns ugly when the two decide to be monogamous. Women often say men have a problem with commitment, but could it be possible that our issue is feeling like some one owns us. And from what my female friends tell me; when a man is eager to be in a relationship, he soon becomes controlling. I put forth the question. Are we monogamous for the right reasons, or is it an extension of our selfish nature? Continue Reading
Are the Genders Really Equal?
The question came to me when I was the only guy in a local natural hair salon. One of the ladies was complaining that her husband wants her to stay at home and have babies. I stated that I wouldn’t mine staying home with the kids and watching TV or playing Playstation all day. I received four distinct dirty looks. So are we all equal or is it still the man’s job to be the bread-winner, mow the lawn, and fix anything that breaks?
What is Prostitution>
Prostitution is the act of exchanging sexual pleasure for money. Isn’t all sex an exchange of sexual pleasure for something? In the most quintessential terms, sex is a barter of pleasure for pleasure. Should sex without the intent of procreation be illegal? Is the “social ill” of prostitution unjustly illegal? What impact would legalizing prostitution have on the community and society? Continue Reading